I always look forward to a new year. A fresh start and a chance to reflect. I'm not one for making resolutions and sometimes as much as we don't want to drag things into the new year with us, we can't leave everything behind but year after year we're given an opportunity to reflect on the year we've just completed and hopefully we learn from mistakes and start fresh, wiser than we were before.
I don't make resolutions because each year I want to have a rebirth of sorts learning from the past and not just a list of simple things that I hope I can keep up, like giving up ice cream or French fries (neither of which I would ever do, by the way) Last year was a very awakening year for me. It was painful. The last two years have actually been very painful and I ended up feeling lost in the midst of it all. Looking for little pockets of joy here and there, hope in small things and the focus on good things to come. It actually ended much better than it started and for that I am thankful.
The last seven months or so I have come into a place I didn't really expect to be. Growth is hard, I'm ever changing just like everyone else and the truth is that we all need to give ourselves the space and freedom to keep growing. I'm the first to admit I make mistakes and sometimes I get things right but either way I always try to learn from either one and then I try to give myself time to heal and grow from that. Last year was growth for me. I'm hoping this year is more flourishing and blooming, much more beautiful to look at than the last but I'm thankful for everything I have learned so far.
We're all just trying to figure it out. I saw this quote yesterday about Mothers, "be gentle with your Mother, it's her first time living too" and it hit me very hard because we really are just all trying to figure this out. Trying not to repeat mistakes from our own parents, trying to be loving and kind, trying to make everyone feel accepted and know that they have a place at the table, trying to raise kids who are also kind and loving with as little generational trauma as possible, right? We're all just in this together and trying to figure out what works. What makes us happy. What makes us feel alive. If you're lucky you find other people you love to share life with and you give them space to grow and figure it out with you.
That's where I am this January. Still growing and learning. Still loving and trying to just trust the process and give myself and everyone else space to heal and grow and change alongside me.
This is going to be a wonderful year. I can feel it xx
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